Ep 30- Building Lifelong Healthy Habits with Dr.Orlena
August 29, 2024
Dr. Orlena trained as a medical doctor in the UK. She is now a wellness motivator coach. She’s famous for helping women to transform their lives so that they feel fit, toned and vibrant in a way that they enjoy that works for them. (Without counting calories or depriving themselves.)
Tune in to learn…
Overcoming obstacles around creating healthy habits
Finding time for yourself as a mom
The truth about discipline
The importance of systems and routines
Amber: Hello everyone. We have a special guest today. Dr. Orlena is joining us to talk about healthy habits. So Dr. Olena, will you introduce yourself?
Dr. Orlena: Hello. Thank you so much for having me. Yes. I am a doctor. I'm from the UK. I trained actually in pediatrics and I moved to Spain nearly 13 years ago, which meant, long story short, I basically pivoted and I started off trying to teach parents how to help their children have healthy habits and to eat healthily. And then around, oh my goodness, I'm guessing six years ago now, I pivoted and now I really help women to To transform their lives essentially. So they may be feeling fed up, overwhelmed, lacking in energy. They may want to lose weight, but really what I teach them to do is transform their lives so that they have amazingly healthy habits that they enjoy so that they can do things like have more energy. And really it's about leading a fulfilling and vibrant rest of life. So you can do all of that stuff that you want to do.
Amber: Yeah, and I love your approach to that because that's exactly what I think, too, is we really have to build these sustainable lifelong habits versus making this quick overnight success. So tell us a little bit more about how you got into this work and what inspired you to do this and help other women.
Dr. Orlena: Yeah, well, I think my own personal journey, I have four children who. My goodness, they're getting old now. My oldest is 16, makes me feel so old when I say that, but when they were young, I had four of them who were under four and a half. So I had twins who were number three and four. And at that stage, and I was living in Spain and feeling a little bit like I'd lost my personality, lost myself, my identity really, because I wasn't working as a clinician.
I was attempting to make a go of blogging on the internet. I had no idea about blogging. And really at that time, I could see myself being grumpy mum essentially. And I was living my dream life in Spain, everyone thought I was on holiday and yet inside, I didn't feel like that, not so that you would notice it.
Like, as I know that you've shared your story on my podcast and really, people wouldn't have looked at me and gone, Oh my goodness, you feel so down in the dumps. They're like, no, you're living this amazing life, but there was this feeling of unsatisfactory, my life wasn't satisfactory and really seeing myself being this grumpy person, crossed with the kids and I didn't want to do this. And so my journey really started in looking at my own emotions and what was going on and really taking that step to start looking after myself. So for example, I started swimming in the swimming pool when I took the kids to swimming classes. And now, 10 years later on, I swim every single day in the Mediterranean Sea, well, every single day in the summer. But it's my absolute passion. And I really say, I live a life of luxury and I don't mean I have a Louis Vuitton handbag. I mean, I get to do the stuff that I want to do. And I really, enjoy swimming so much. It really is a thing that really gives me, helps me deal with stress. It just is this amazing thing that I do in my life that also happens to be healthy and good for me.
It's a sort of win win situation. And that was the kind of transformations that I went through. And that's what I help other people do as well.
Amber: So it sounds like as you started to build these habits, you started seeing how your life could become even more enjoyable. And I think a lot of us, we place like our happiness on these external measures of how nice is our house? What kind of country, beautiful country do we live in across the world?
What are our clothes like in our car? Like, but really, it's like these everyday habits that are what make our life so much better.
Dr. Orlena: Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And that really resonates with some of the people I work with. I remember one lady who I have worked with and her just saying, you know, on the surface, I had everything, a good job, a loving partner, a family, all of these things. And it wasn't really until I started looking at these things that I realized how I wasn't really satisfied with life and now I'm just leading the life that I really want to lead. But being intentional with it in such a way that you are doing it so that It is supporting your health and wellness. So it's thinking about longevity and thinking about, well, how can I have this amazing life for her? It's playing tennis and pickleball that she totally loves, but really enjoying all of these things so that they're just second nature side note, the habits that we talked about in my podcast, really just so that you're just doing it on autopilot and thinking, Hey, my life's amazing.
Obviously there are challenges. There's never, you're never going to take away all of the challenges, but my default life is. Yeah, I'm lucky to be me. I've got the life that I love. I really enjoy doing it.
Amber: What are some obstacles that either you or your clients tend to run into when they're trying to build new healthy habits for their life?
Dr. Orlena: Yeah, that's a really good question. And I think what I would say to people is there are two bits to it. Number one is choosing the right habits. So really, for example, when I talk about exercise, I always talk about exercise that lights you up because We all have different things that we enjoy. I enjoy swimming.
Some people hate swimming and that's fine. I'm not saying that everybody has to go swimming. I personally am not so keen on running, but other people really love running. I've had someone who said to me, I hate yoga. Everyone's always telling me to do yoga, but I don't want to do yoga. It's fine.
It's about knowing what works for you and yourself. So that's really. first key and well, even before that is being able to say to yourself, being able to prioritize yourself and say, yeah, I'm gonna do this. I'm going to make these changes. So that's the first one is. Prioritizing yourself.
The second one is choosing the changes that are going to fit in with your life. And then the third bit is really keep doing it and keep doing it. And that is really where habits come into play. And I think a big problem with habits is people think that they have a habit. And this is what I call the difference between an oak tree habit and an acorn habit. So for example, you might be building up a new habit. It's January the 1st and you're like, Oh, I'm going to walk around the block. It's going to be amazing. By the middle of February, you've totally forgotten to walk around the block because life is always busy. Life in you've just not got around to it. And at that stage, when you realize that you're like, Oh, I had that habit and it didn't work for me, but that's not true. It wasn't a habit. Okay. It was an acorn habit, and your habits are really the things that you do. when life gets tough. When you're stressed, when you're overwhelmed, your habits are the things that you're doing in that situation.
And I think people get confused about this, that a habit can be helpful to your health, not helpful to your health. Obviously you always get something from a habit, but when we're intentional with our habits, that's when the gold really happens because that's when you're doing things that are supporting your health so that it's just normal.
It's just, you do it without thinking, basically.
Amber: Yeah, so you're a mom and I'm sure as a mom you get busy and a lot of people's big excuse that I hear as moms is like, I just don't have time for myself. Like, I just can't get that in. I just have got to take the kids to soccer and do this and this. So how do you find time to build these healthy habits and take care of yourself?
Dr. Orlena: Yeah, that's a really good question as well. And is a really, really, really tricky one. And there are different stages of parenthood and it depends on what job you're doing and all of these things. And I would say, you know, when you've got really young babies, It is really difficult because they need you 24 seven and you are there.
And it's different for everybody because some people may have help. I didn't have any help. Obviously I've got a very supportive and helpful husband, but I didn't have family close to me. I didn't have grandparents who would take them for a day or a night or things like that. So I did like the vast majority, myself and my husband.
So it does depend on your situation, but it's all about systems and habits. So I break this down into four habits and I say, you've got Four pillars. You've got nutrition, exercise, sleep, and then emotional wellness. Now, it depends which habit that you're looking at, but let's take nutrition, for example, and I'm always about healthy and enjoyable food. Everybody has to prepare their food, whether they're eating healthy food or unhealthy food. So it's really about looking at your systems and figuring out how can I create systems that make it easy for me to do this? So an example is on Wednesday, I always use the slow cooker. You might call it a crock pot, but it's really easy.
It's something that I just do automatically. So a lot of it is about looking at your systems and working out, what are those things that are really going to move the needle? You don't have to do everything. Start small and build up. You don't have to go out and start running a marathon. People don't just go, right, I'm going to go and run 40 kilometers. They start small and they build up. So I think it's about having a, I can do it attitude, but being realistic with, well, how much can you take on whilst you're building up this habit until you've got to another habit?
Amber: Right. I love that you said everyone has to prepare food whether it's healthy or unhealthy, because my, like, hardest thing is always the meal prep stuff, like getting myself to actually spend time cooking and preparing food, like, I hate it. It is my least favorite thing. And so that is always like where I'm trying to work on like getting myself to do things.
And I think part of it is too. I'm single. I don't have a family. So I'm just cooking for myself all the time. So it's a little, I can, If I want to eat at 4 p. m. or 8 p. m., it doesn't really matter to me, and I just gotta decide when I want to start cooking. But I think that's a good point. Like, whether I'm making a little box of lentils in the microwave real quick, or something, like, more extravagant, like, I'm still taking some time to make that food, and I think knowing that, like, we're always going to have to spend some time to nourish ourself, to feed ourself.
You know, you can go through the drive thru at McDonald's, and that's fine still takes time or you can make something at home and that still also takes time. So just knowing that whatever we do or don't do it for exercising takes time, but sitting on the couch and watching TV also takes time.
So we're spending time looking at how we're really spending our time and knowing that both of those habits, either helpful or unhelpful or using up our time.
Dr. Orlena: Yeah, absolutely. And it's all about moderation. It's not about saying, Oh, I'm never allowed to sit and watch movies, or I'm never allowed to have takeout or go to McDonald's. It's about getting that balance right and finding ways that are easy. So I always eat healthily. Because it's just second nature to me.
It's part of my identity now and it's easy for me because I just have so many ways. Well, to be honest, I eat a lot of salady stuff, which is really easy. It doesn't take that much time or baked vegetables. So it's just about, that mindset shift of how can I make this work as opposed to, I don't have time.
How can I make something? How can I improve something? I don't have to do it perfectly, but how can I do something slightly different.
Amber: So I'm curious with all your helpful eating habits, if you ever had any resistance to eating that way, because I know for me, sometimes it felt like, oh, it's kind of like the diet y foods, or I have to eat this big salad, and I don't really want to eat a big salad, so I kind of went to the other side when I was kind of recovering from that diet phase.
So I'm curious if you or your clients ever met with resistance when you're trying to change to those healthier foods.
Dr. Orlena: Some of my clients, so I have had clients who like, I advocate a plant based diet, which doesn't mean you can't eat meat, but you're eating lots of plants. And I have had some clients who don't like vegetables and they had to really go back to the beginning and really learn how to like vegetables.
But a lot of what we eat is habit as well. And for me, I grew up in what I would call the white refined carbohydrate era in that, you know, we have. Breakfast cereal for breakfast and then we'd have a sandwich for lunch and then we'd have pasta for dinner and it wasn't really until I started looking into nutrition my children were little going, Oh, what?
Like white refined carbohydrates aren't good for us. Like that can't be right. Like bread's not good for you. Who, and it's not so much that it's not good for you, but it's, there are different ways of getting your carbohydrates, let's say, and it's better to have the carbohydrates that are wrapped up with the good things like the antioxidants and the fiber than to have the pure white carbohydrate. So for me, it was a bit of a mindset change and doing things differently. And at that time I had young kids. I think I was probably breastfeeding. Cause I just remember being really hungry at lunchtime going, what happens if I don't eat toast or bread at lunchtime, I'm going to be really hungry. But then that mindset of being able to shift that to go, actually, I can get as many carbohydrates as I want from my fruit and vegetables, and that's a much healthier source of carbohydrates. And I don't have to be hungry and I can feel nourished. And now I find myself it's just totally second nature. I actually prefer not to eat foods like that because, well, partly because I'm thinking about what it's doing to the inside of my body, but partly I just find foods so amazingly sweet and
they make me feel slightly sick. And I'm a bit like, yeah, if I could choose, I'd rather eat my healthy, delicious foods that I find easy to make and are tasty than, for example, my 16 year old son. He likes to make a big, decadent chocolate cake. And I do eat it because obviously he's made it. But yeah, if I'm given the choice, I'd be like, I just want the fruit now, really.
Amber: Right. And I like that you mentioned when you thought, oh my gosh, I can't have toast anymore. I can't have these carbs. Like we need carbs still as humans. And this is a big mistake I see a lot of people making is when they come to me, I'll see them having like these little baby salads with just a little chicken and their low fat dressing.
And they're like, why am I binge eating? You know, all evening and I'm like, well, you haven't had any carbs and your body needs some carbs. And so I like to think about like adding on or substituting versus removing, like we're not getting rid of the more processed carbs. We're just switching things out.
We're just adding other things in. It's a rotation of foods versus like an elimination. And I think that really helps people's mindset. To see, okay, we're not like restricting here. We're just changing things up I also think it's important to note at like what each food is giving you When we have something like more of like the processed white carbs That can be an important thing for pleasure.
It can be something that's really enjoyable but we want to make sure we use it for pleasure in the sense that it feels pleasurable, not just to our mind, but to our body, right? And if we're eating endless amounts of processed white carbs, it's not going to feel good to our body. And therefore it's not going to be pleasurable.
So if we're wanting something for pleasure, awesome, but making sure that it still feels good to us. And then also making sure if we're hungry, we need nutrition, we need actual food. And so giving ourself the nutrition when we need the nutrition and allowing yourself the pleasure when it's appropriate and in amounts that also feel good to us.
Dr. Orlena: Yeah, I totally agree, and I think what happens is, the more aware you are of your eating and the different foods that you're eating, the more, actually, that those refined carbohydrates become less enjoyable. So, for example, this morning my son is working in a cafe and he brought home some chocolate croissants.
Now, I was chopping them up to make it even, to distribute them between my kids, and there was a tiny bit. And so I tried it. And I actually don't find it very enjoyable. I prefer to eat the beautiful fresh fruit I have. That's what I enjoy eating now. Now, I'm sure that if I didn't spend the last however many years focusing on food and nutrition and all of these things, the enjoyment would be the same.
But for me, The enjoyment of something that actually promotes health in my body feels more comfortable for me, but also the taste. I try these things and I'm like, oh wow, it's so sweet. Why would I eat that? Like what pleasure am I getting from that? As opposed to your taste buds change actually with the more sugar you eat, the more sugar you need to be able to taste things.
So if you're eating lots of highly refined things, the fruit and vegetables don't taste as good to you. But because I don't eat them very often. When I taste the fruit and vegetables, I'm thinking, Oh my goodness, this peach tastes so peachy and delicious. It's amazing.
Amber: I love that because that's a big thing I have noticed in my own life is how much more picky I've gotten around food and just how it's really not all worth it. Like especially oh my gosh I think Halloween candy is the grossest thing now, like it tastes like shit plastic y to me. I just tastes so processed.
Like I can in it. But I wasn't able to notice that until I started becoming aware and something I teach my called my trigger food p essentially where we eat A whole bunch of these foods first a bit so we can start to see how they're actually not that special and they're probably not actually as good as our brain imagines when we have all these rules and special things around them and put them on a pedestal.
When you start to take these foods off of a pedestal and you start to pay attention on like, do I actually like this food? You might surprise yourself. And I think too. When we're talking about how we feel and how it feels in our body, I hear a lot of people be like, oh, I know it doesn't feel good. But like to get really specific on how it doesn't feel good, how specifically does it feel in your stomach?
And how does it specifically feel that blood sugar type feeling? Like those very specific things are what will help you notice Okay, do I like this food? Do I not like this food? Does it actually feel good or not?
Dr. Orlena: Exactly. Exactly.
Amber: So do you have any other things that you want to teach our listeners today or that you frequently teach your clients about healthy habits that you want to mention?
Dr. Orlena: I think one thing that we talked about was discipline and this idea that so many people say, Oh my goodness, I can't have a healthy life. I can't eat healthily because I'm not disciplined enough. And that's just not true. And they've done studies on this actually. That the thing about discipline is it's putting yourself in a difficult situation and expecting yourself to make a good choice.
So what does this look like? It looks like, okay, breakfast. I am going to make the choice between, let's say broccoli and cake, just as, you know, examples of healthy food or not healthy food. Now in the morning, you've just woken up, you've had a coaching session with your health coach, and you're feeling super ready to take on the world.
And you say, I'm going to go for broccoli. Now at lunchtime, you've got the same choice, broccoli or cake. And you're feeling reasonably good, so you're going to choose broccoli again. Now it's dinner time, and you are totally stressed. You've had a really busy day at work. You've driven through loads of traffic to get home.
You've walked in the door, your kids are screaming, and I don't know, you're, you're Cat has left you a present on the floor and the world is just a different place now. And now you think, okay, broccoli or cake? And you're like, give me the cake. I just don't care. And that is discipline. That is putting yourself in a situation where you have to make a choice. But if you do it a different way, we're gonna use broccoli and cauliflower as an example. For breakfast, I'm going to choose between broccoli and cauliflower, two equally healthy things. Well, it doesn't really matter. Pick whichever one you want. I'm going to go for broccoli. Lunchtime, the same thing. I'm going to choose cauliflower this time.
Dinner. Yep. You've had this really, really stressful day, but all you've got in your house is broccoli or cauliflower, and you're going to pick one of them and you're going to eat it because you're hungry and it nourishes your body. And this is really illustrating the difference between discipline and setting up your life. the studies that they've done have looked at people who think that they are disciplined and people who think they aren't disciplined. And what they actually did was gave them a little bleep so that every time they had to make one of those decisions, they would bleep it. And that's what they recorded. And it turns out that actually people who are disciplined, they're just not having to make these decisions. They just don't put themselves in that situation so many times of the day. So if you're thinking I'm lacking discipline, I put it to you that you're not lacking discipline. Everybody's discipline will run out at a certain time, it's about, well, internal limits is one thing that plays into this, but also how you've built up your life around you.
Like, what are the things that you do? So what are your habits? This is what I call habits, systems, and routines. And so how you create your healthy lifestyle is actually super important. And the more work you put into making it easy, the easier it is for you. And that's when you just do these things. And then after you've been doing them for a bit, you couldn't ever imagine life any differently.
And you're feeling amazing. So it's. just not about discipline. Absolutely.
Amber: I love that. And I love thinking about how you can structure and systemize your day to make it easier for you and to make sure that you have the tools and resources ready to go throughout the day so you don't end up in the situations that you don't want to end up in. I like to think a lot of times with like stress and anxiety.
It's like a kind of like a drippy faucet with a bucket underneath and we need to keep entering emptying out that bucket so it doesn't overflow. So if you're going all day and you're not taking any moment to yourself taking any time for self care, even if it's just five seconds of breathing a little deeper.
Then that bucket's going to keep overflowing. And so we need to take that time to have those routines and systems to help de stress ourselves, to prioritize ourself, to take care of ourself, because that's, what's going to make it maintainable and easier long term.
Well, awesome. Well, any last thoughts or you can tell the people where they can find you and how you can work with you.
Dr. Orlena: Well, thank you. Thank you so much. My last thoughts are mirroring your last thoughts in that. Yes, you can make changes. And I really think that people do not realize how small changes can really have a huge, great impact on their life in terms of feeling more healthy and having more energy and having confidence and happiness, all these things that are actually really important to us. So I have a website called drolina. com and I have a podcast. I also do coaching and invite people if they're interested in my program to come and book a call. But I think the best place to really start is I have a book called building simple habits to a healthy me, which is super cheap. It's like 1 on Kindle and 5 if you buy the paperback and it's a little workbook that you can work through.
And it's really great place to just understand where you can start. I always say to people, you don't have a knowledge gap. You have a doing gap and you just don't know which bit to be doing. And it will really help you figure that out.
Amber: That's awesome. And congrats on the book. What a big accomplishment. That's such a fun thing to have. And tell us, what's your podcast?
Dr. Orlena: My podcast is Fit and Fabulous at 40 and Beyond with Dr. Orlina.
Amber: Yeah. And I was just interviewed on there too. So you can go check out my interview if you wanted to learn more about me, but go check out her podcast, go check out her book book a free call with her. I'll have all those links in the show notes below so you can access them. And again, thank you so much, Dr. Orlena for coming on today.
Dr. Orlena: Absolute pleasure. Thank you.