Ep 62- Why Mindset Is The Missing Piece to Becoming a Confident Eater
April 17, 2025
Do you feel like you’re doing all the things to stop binge eating but nothing sticks? Maybe you’ve created a meal plan, started tracking calories, journaled, or followed all the Instagram accounts for tips with no long term results.
Then mindset could be your missing key to food freedom.
You’ll learn…
Why actions alone won’t create lasting change
How your thoughts and feelings drive binge eating
Real-life mindset examples (and how to shift them)
Transcript:
Okay, confident Eaters. This week I have a new special free gift for you. So before we get started, I want you to go down to the show notes and check out the new podcast Worksheet bundle. As you've noticed the past couple of episodes, I have been trying to be very intentional with making a worksheet for you for each episode, and I've decided instead of just getting one worksheet when you sign up, you will get the entire worksheet bundle totally for free.
Now these worksheets will help you take your learning in the podcast. The next level you will be able to get the highlights of the podcast. So if you're ever like, oh my gosh, that quote was so good, I wish I could write that down. Those good quotes will be in the podcast worksheets. You'll also have space to journal and write, and any prompts that I give you throughout the podcast will be there so you can really start taking action on your goal to stop binge eating instead of just thinking about it and passively learning. So make sure you go download that now.
Today we're going to be talking about mindset. Now, if you're like me, I used to think mindset was not that important, but the truth is, this is one of the most important things that helped me to stop binge eating. And if you feel like you're already doing all the things, but nothing ever changes with your eating, your planning, tracking, journaling, listening to podcasts, doing the research, finding accounts on Instagram, you're probably missing the most important piece of mindset.
So today we're gonna go over why your mindset matters more than just your actions, how your thoughts and feelings impact binge eating, and we'll go over some real life examples of how to apply this concept of changing your mindset, because I know it can be a bit abstract at times.
So when I was learning how to stop binge eating, I consumed all the information. I literally read every article there was on binge eating and overeating on Google, scrolling to past page 50 in the search bar. I would read articles and podcasts, and I felt like I was learning so much and getting so much knowledge, but nothing was changing long term. I would try to implement a tip and then it might work for a day, but then I would totally forget about it and go back to my own ways.
Why does this happen? It was because I was only changing my actions and not my thoughts or feelings. This made my life so much harder, but when I finally started doing mindset work, everything shifted. My actions became a hundred times easier. I created lasting change because I was actually rewiring my brain and I was creating a brain that thought at a much higher level and got better results without having to do anything more.
I was already spending so much time on the school to stop binge eating. I didn't wanna spend any more time doing it, so I had to change what thoughts and feelings I was using to get results.
So in order to understand this concept, you first need to know that when something happens in the world, a circumstance, you have thoughts about that circumstance. And then when you have thoughts that creates feelings. And when you have feelings, those drive your actions and give you results.
Okay, so I'll give you an example outside of food. Let's say a coworker asks you to take on a new project and you have the thought I can't take on another project. I am already so overwhelmed. Then the feeling you create is overwhelmed, and the action you take are probably, you shut down. You don't get new creative ideas, you panic.
You procrastinate, you do everything other than the project itself, and the result is you don't actually get that project done in effective, timely manner. Okay, so you see how it's all related.
When your thoughts and feelings support your goals, your actions are gonna become more natural and more enjoyable because you're not gonna be white knuckling your way through urges or forcing it with willpower, everything will feel aligned.
So think instead of the situation where a coworker asks you to take on a project and you think, I've got this. I have plenty of time, even if this time is the same in your schedule, the same time exists. Even if you have that same amount of time as a circumstance, your thoughts will give you a different result and make you feel differently.
So without mindset, every action is going to feel like an uphill battle without changing your thoughts. It is like trying to push a giant ball uphill. You might feel like you are doing something, you might feel like you are taking all the actions to stop binge eating, but really you are making your life so much harder. You are like running in place. You are giving yourself that metaphorical giant ball that is requiring extra work to push uphill.
Okay, so let's go over some real life examples of this. Something that you might be doing is an action like chewing gum or drinking water, doing something to try to fight a binge urge that is an action.
So let's notice that this circumstance here is you start chewing gum when you want to binge. Let's say your first thought while you're chewing this gum is, I cannot handle this urge. I just want to binge. When you think that you are going to feel hopeless and the action you are going to take is you are going to binge anyway, the result being you didn't handle the urge. Okay, now let's think about you start chewing gum. And you have the thought of, I've got this. I don't actually want to binge right now.
You are going to feel motivated and empowered, and you're decreasing your desire for bingeing. You don't want to binge. Then your action is going to be you sit with the urge and you move on, and the result being you handle the urge you don't binge.
So notice how, even though you are. The same action of chewing gum. You are getting completely different results based on what you think. So if you feel like you are trying these things and these tips and they're not working, we gotta look at your thoughts.
Okay? Let's use another example. We are probably entering wedding season any day now. So let's say you have a wedding coming up and you have this thought of I have to stop overeating and lose weight before the wedding. You are going to start to feel a lot of pressure. A lot of rush to do this right away, which will lead to you to the actions of extreme dieting restriction and then ending up binge eating, and the result is unsustainable. Even if you do end up losing weight, you're probably not going to keep it off because it was so extreme. You're gonna feel really stressed out and possibly even gain more weight.
Now, let's think about the same circumstance. You have a wedding coming up, but you decide to think, I want to feel my best and I will choose to love and accept my body no matter what. Then you might feel excited to go through this next couple weeks before the wedding and your actions are eating nourishing food, speaking to yourself kindly, and the result is you get what you actually want, which is having the best time ever at the wedding. You feel joyful. You feel confident. You feel really good.
+ So notice that even though the same situation existed, the weeks that come after you decide you want to feel good at this wedding are going to be very different and have different results based on what thoughts you are using.
So in order to start changing your mindset, I want you to notice your thoughts. Ask yourself, how does it make me feel when I think this and when I feel this way? What actions will it drive and do I want these actions?
This is like lifting the hood under the car so you can see what is actually going on. This is doing the deeper work.
Then once you notice, oh, I am thinking the thought and it is not helpful, then we are going to practice choosing more empowering thoughts, even if they are just slightly better.
So you do not have to go from thinking. It feels impossible for me to stop binge eating to I 100% for sure can stop binge eating this week. It doesn't have to be that drastic. It could just be a thought like it's possible for me to stop binge eating this week. This is what I called a stepladder thought.
It is one thought above where you are now, and if you believe it's possible for you to stop binge eating this week, then you are going to go out there and actually try. You're not going to give up. So even if it's a slightly better thought. It'll give you better results than the one you are having now, and you want your thought to be believable.
Then you want to practice your new thoughts to make it easier. It's like working out a muscle. The more you think this new thought, the more automatic it will come. So practice thinking it's possible for me to stop binge eating. I've got this. I can handle these urges. I can change my relationship with food. It is possible for me to stop at just one piece of cake and move on.
When you think these thoughts, all of the actions are going to be 100 times easier, you're not gonna be working as hard. You're not gonna be spending as much time trying to stop binge eating. It will just become so effortless, so flowy, and so much fun too because you're not resisting everything. Your thoughts are not the obstacle holding back. You get out of your own way.
So I want to leave you with today. You don't need to try harder, you just need to think differently. And when you do that, it will make all the difference.
Now, if you are wanting some help with your thoughts and changing them, this is exactly what we do in coaching Together and in my Confident Eater Program, we are going to do the deep mindset work to support your goal, to stop binge eating and overeating, and we are gonna make your life a hundred times easier. Yes, you can do this on your own. Yes, it is possible. But when we work together, we are going to remove that heavy ball that is keeping you stuck downhill, and make your life so much more fun and make these changes truly permanent.